Day 7 - Where I Am Now

My heart carries the scar from the loss of her, torn twice through with the loss of them. It's an ugly scar, the result of deep pain. It's there bearing witness to the journey.

I wouldn't say that this is the end of the road because it feels like it's a new road, a road I diverted down one day in December '09. That day marks one of life's defining moments, when life as I knew it shifted and changed. I have grown and learnt and changed because of it - my focus sharper, my heart softer.

I was knocked down, but I'm not defeated. I have cried many tears but hope has comforted me. For I believe that my babies live on in the presence of their Saviour. Their joy unending, their love divine. Had Charlotte lived, hers would be a journey fraught with disability and pain. Yet our merciful God took her home and made her whole again.

I believe beyond doubt that I will see them again... it's only a matter of time. Until then I will rest in the knowledge that my girls are perfectly happy growing and dancing in the courts of heaven and that...  allows me to smile again.



Me now