tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-41423754923757587712024-02-20T23:32:44.049+08:00We Dreamed of YouIn loving memory of our precious daughters ~Charlotte Rose~ born still on April 14th 2010
and ~Abigail~ lost at 12 weeks January 25th 2011.Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.comBlogger112125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-18502815805036264022017-04-14T17:36:00.000+08:002017-04-14T17:44:34.295+08:00Did You See Us?<br />
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Dearest Charlotte,<br />
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I wonder if you were looking through the heavenly veil today?<br />
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If you were, you would have seen us leaving flowers beside your name. They were our gift to you.<br />
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You would have seen us clearing away the leaves and sand that lay nearby, while your brothers and sisters decorated your special place. We wanted to do something for you.<br />
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You would have seen us standing quiet with no words, just with our thoughts and memories. We always remember because you are written on our hearts.<br />
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You would have also seen us sitting around a cake with candles, singing. We were singing to you.<br />
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Today, on your 7th birthday we celebrated you! We celebrated because you are our God-given child, our daughter living in eternity. We celebrated because you are part of us, we know this separation is not for always. We celebrated because you are alive and well, completely safe and perfectly loved.<br />
Today on April 14, we had lots to celebrate and remember.<br />
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We love you dearly and are eternally thankful for the gift of you and the impact that your life has made.<br />
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Happy 7th birthday Charlotte Rose. We do wish that we could have celebrated with you but if you saw us today, you would have known and would have seen, how very much we love you.<br />
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Until tomorrow...</div>
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xxxxxx<br />
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<span style="color: #073763;"><i>"In Him we were chosen, </i></span></div>
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<span style="color: #073763;"><i>having been predestined according to the plan of Him </i></span><i style="color: #073763;">who </i></div>
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<i style="color: #073763;">works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, </i></div>
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<span style="color: #073763;"><i>in order that we, who were the first to hope in Christ, </i></span></div>
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<span style="color: #073763;"><i>might be for the praise of His glory." </i></span></div>
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<span style="color: #073763;"><i>Ephesians 1:11-12</i></span></div>
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<br />Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-25824887823915676852016-04-14T21:43:00.000+08:002016-04-14T21:43:16.151+08:00Six<br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">our darling girl...</span></h3>
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we celebrate you,</h3>
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remembering 6 years ago</h3>
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April 14 2010</h3>
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when we met you and held you...</h3>
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and said goodbye..</h3>
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for now.</h3>
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Six years ago you became part of our family... </h3>
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forever.</h3>
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Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-75717742969641237462015-04-14T19:57:00.000+08:002015-04-24T13:48:39.494+08:00Five Years <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Remembering our precious daughter and sister Charlotte Rose, </div>
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who was born quietly into the arms of Jesus 5 years ago today.</div>
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We will love you always...</div>
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<br />Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-42152942092413009382014-08-26T15:15:00.001+08:002017-11-02T06:38:38.897+08:00My Testimony<span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="color: black;">I had the amazing privilege of sharing my testimony at the Perth Women's Convention on August 9th. </span><br />
I would be honoured if you would like to listen to it. Please use the link below.<br />
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><a href="https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/23841673/PWC2014/Julie%20Douglas%20Testimony.mp3">https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/23841673/PWC2014/Julie%20Douglas%20Testimony.mp3</a></span></span><br />
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<br /></span></span><br />Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-63374783907677458282014-04-15T17:10:00.002+08:002014-04-15T17:14:54.392+08:00Happy Birthday!<br />
Dearest Charlotte,<br />
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I imagine that you have grown in statue as well as in other ways that come naturally with age.</div>
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I imagine you, a four year old girl, full of life and joy, running and playing with your sister and all the other sweet children who call heaven their home.</div>
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Today marks four years since you were born to us and four years since you left us for your heavenly home. Four years since I felt your life within me and held you close.</div>
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Sometimes fours years feels so long ago. 1461 sunrises and sunsets and all the days in between. On the other hand... my heart feels like it was only yesterday.</div>
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Today we celebrate you - our daughter, our fourth born child, a member of our family. We are so thankful for you and the impact that you have had and continue to have on our lives.</div>
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We praise God that you live! We praise Him for the love, life, joy and peace that is yours in a paradise that we can not even begin to imagine.</div>
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Our hearts will not forget you precious Charlotte. Time will not diminish our love for you.</div>
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We will always wish that we had more time with you but we know that eternity is but a breath away and we will see you again soon.</div>
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Until then... may you continue to sing and dance in the courts of heaven!</div>
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"To God be the glory forever and ever."</div>
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With so much love</div>
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Mummy </div>
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xxxx</div>
Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-85020424252672889892014-04-14T21:51:00.000+08:002014-04-15T17:15:27.587+08:00Celebrating You - April 14, 2014<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Dearest Charlotte,</div>
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I imagine that you have grown in statue as well as in other ways that come naturally with age.</div>
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I imagine you, a four year old girl, full of life and joy, running and playing with your sister and all the other sweet children who call heaven their home.</div>
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Today marks four years since you were born to us and four years since you left us for your heavenly home. Four years since I felt your life within me and held you close.</div>
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Sometimes fours years feels so long ago. 1461 sunrises and sunsets and all the days in between. On the other hand... my heart feels like it was only yesterday.</div>
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Today we celebrate you - our daughter, our fourth born child, a member of our family. We are so thankful for you and the impact that you have had and continue to have on our lives.</div>
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We praise God that you live! We praise Him for the love, life, joy and peace that is yours in a paradise that we can not even begin to imagine.</div>
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Our hearts will not forget you precious Charlotte. Time will not diminish our love for you.</div>
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We will always wish that we had more time with you but we know that eternity is but a breath away and we will see you again soon.</div>
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Until then... may you continue to sing and dance in the courts of heaven!</div>
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"To God be the glory forever and ever."</div>
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With so much love</div>
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Mummy </div>
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xxx </div>
<br />Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-5673485791920089762013-10-31T21:46:00.002+08:002013-10-31T21:50:28.243+08:00Day 31 - Sunset<div align="left" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">What a journey! I have been challenged, encouraged, supported and stretched while I have been writing my 31 day 'Capture Your Grief' journal. Thank you to everyone who has read my posts, 'liked' them and left comments, it has been very encouraging. To write is therapy, to have people read what I've written is liberating... a grief shared. </span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">I have felt connected, part of a community, united sadly through the loss of our babies. We find strength by standing together, understanding through personal experience and love for each other through tender, broken hearts.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">All of this is written in honour of the One who gave us life.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">I also honour the memory of my precious baby girls Charlotte Rose & Abigail Faith- </span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">for without them there wouldn't be a story to tell. </span></em></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Sunset - Perth Western Australia<br />
31st October, 6.40pm</td></tr>
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Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-44946676300093990652013-10-30T23:26:00.001+08:002013-10-31T00:02:37.044+08:00Day 30 - Change<br />
One of life's most defining moments - the loss of a child, how can you not be changed? <br />
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Many times I have wondered where 'I' have gone??<br />
My loss... has tilted the axis of my heart, allowing me to see the world from a slightly different angle. Those things that were invisible or unclear to me, have now come into focus. People... life... suffering... joy... grief. What can I do? How can I help? This clarity brings responsibility. I want to change because of them. Their lives were impacting. <br />
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They have made love richer, relationships important, heaven even more real, appreciation and thankfulness deeper and our love for God stronger.<br />
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My babies... I will be forever grateful for the gift of you and the difference you have made. <br />
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Oh how I love them...<br />
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Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-83705965521144238942013-10-29T19:49:00.001+08:002013-10-29T19:54:06.772+08:00Day 29 - Healing...<div align="left" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><span style="color: #0c343d; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"><em>A baby to hold and a balm to my heart...</em></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #0c343d;"><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><strong>LEAH</strong></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #0c343d;"><span style="color: #0c343d;"><span style="color: #0c343d; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: small;">A letter written to Charlotte - April 2012, shortly after the birth of Leah</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #0c343d;"><span style="color: #0c343d;"><span style="color: #0c343d; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: small;"> ~A heart torn between blessing and loss~ </span></span></span></span></div>
<span style="color: #0c343d;"><span style="color: #0c343d;"><span style="color: #0c343d;"><em></em></span></span></span><br />
<em><span style="color: #0c343d;"><span style="color: #0c343d;">My darling girl, my pen is not dry, my heart has not forgotten and my mind has not finished with your story. </span><br /><span style="color: #0c343d;">An earthly glimpse reveals your new little sister - you now have 2 brothers and 3 sisters - one that is by your side throughout all eternity.</span><br /><span style="color: #0c343d;">You will always be our 4th born child, our second daughter, forever etched into our family regardless of your address.</span><br /><span style="color: #0c343d;">For the 9 months that your sister grew, I wrestled with carrying life and the loss of you. You, my sweet baby who never cried, I miss not having life with you.</span><br /><span style="color: #0c343d;">The birth of your sister, a God-given gift brought a wail from my soul - one of thankfulness and sadness, as two worlds collided - life and loss.</span><br /><span style="color: #0c343d;">I see you in her. Your face, your hands... I call her Charlotte, only to abruptly remember that she is not. My mind is confused as if someone is playing a trick on me.</span><br /><span style="color: #0c343d;">All my children, a gift from God, meant to be, none replacing the other, each created for God's own purpose and glory. All loved, all wanted, all eternal.</span><br /><span style="color: #0c343d;">My girl, my heart will always be scarred with the loss of you and filled with love for you.</span><br /><span style="color: #0c343d;">Forever your Mummy xxx</span></span></em> Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-37424798159498764522013-10-28T23:31:00.002+08:002013-10-28T23:38:31.695+08:00Day 28 - A Special Place to Remember ~ Charlotte<br />
<em><span style="color: #073763;"><strong>A special place....</strong></span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">My heart's the place that holds her.</span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">From my heart...</span></em><br />
<em><span style="color: #073763;">I desired her... I loved her... I prayed for her... I wanted her...</span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">It was my heart that broke with the loss of her.</span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">And it is with all my heart that I will forever love and remember my precious little girl. </span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">Together we remember Charlotte at the place where we feel closest to her - her resting place.</span></em><em><span style="color: #073763;"> </span></em><br />
<em><span style="color: #073763;">Peaceful... and full of natural beauty.</span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">And at the beach near by, as the sun sets... we remember... </span></em><br />
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Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-79082173518287044972013-10-27T23:55:00.000+08:002013-10-28T00:18:13.581+08:00Day 27 - Signs<strong>27. Signs:</strong> If you believe in life after death do you believe your child has ways of contacting you? Have you had any signs?<br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">Yes, I believe in life eternal, in heaven and in the One who created us.</span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">I believe that I will be reunited with my babies one day... </span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">While I wait... I imagine them dancing in the courts of heaven, singing with the angels, laughing and playing with each other and their friends. I imagine them surrounded by beauty and filled with love, joy, freedom and contentment, alive and well, whole and healed.</span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">I imagine what I believe to be true.</span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">I love watching the sun set over the ocean, thinking about my babies lost. Not long ago, as we were watching the last of the sun's rays pierce through the clouds, I turned to my children and said, "Look, the doors of heaven!"</span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: #073763;">"I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me." 2 Samuel 12:23</span></em><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The door of heaven!</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This heart-shaped cloud appeared in the sky after Charlotte's Memorial Service.<br />
I felt His love for me in that moment.</td></tr>
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Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-68449002225406585282013-10-26T23:38:00.000+08:002013-10-26T23:56:06.941+08:00Day 25 - The Baby Loss Community<br />
This community brings:<br />
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Understanding through personal experience<br />
Heartfelt empathy<br />
A listening ear<br />
Compassion<br />
Love<br />
Support <br />
Companionship<br />
Wisdom to navigate the path of grief<br />
An outlet, an audience<br />
Truth and honesty<br />
Realness - no masks here<br />
Respect for each other<br />
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I am so grateful for this community -<br />
It is a privilege to walk the journey along side you...<br />
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Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-83928029067559338852013-10-25T23:33:00.001+08:002013-10-25T23:53:06.725+08:00Day 25 - 'SAY IT OUT LOUD'<span style="color: #0b5394;"><span style="color: black;"><strong>#SayItOutLoud:</strong> Say It Out Loud is </span><a href="https://www.facebook.com/StillProject">The STILL Project’s</a><span style="color: black;"> famous hashtag. </span><a href="http://stillproject.org/">STILL</a></span><span style="color: black;"> is a feature-length documentary film project aimed at breaking the cycle of silence surrounding pregnancy and infant loss. If you could say anything out loud about your journey with grief with the death or your baby, what would it be? What do you want the world to know? Is there a cause that touches your heart that you want to raise awareness for?</span><br />
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<span style="color: #0b5394;">Life is a<em> journey</em> that we travel through<em> together, </em>in <em>relationship</em> with each other. We travel with family, friends, colleagues, acquaintances, teams, groups, congregations, authorities, employees... we are surrounded by people on our journey through life.</span><br />
<span style="color: #0b5394;"> </span><br />
<span style="color: #0b5394;">So then... why are the hardest times in life often the loneliest? Why is grief so isolating, so desolate?</span><br />
<span style="color: #0b5394;"> </span><br />
<span style="color: #0b5394;">Everyone hurts. At some stage, everyone will experience loss and grief. So why can't we (myself included) travel this part of life's journey<em><strong> together</strong></em>, in relationship with each other?</span><br />
<span style="color: #0b5394;"> </span><br />
<span style="color: #0b5394;">So I would like to 'SAY OUT LOUD' - that it's time to change the way we respond to people in grief and in pain. We all have the power to <em>choose how</em> we are going to respond.* It's time to stop hiding in fear of not knowing what to say of do. It's time to acknowledge 'them' despite how uncomfortable we may feel. It's time that we offered ourselves and our time, even though a lot of the time may be spent in silence.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #0b5394;"><em><strong>Let's enter into each other's pain. Let's walk the journey of life together as we were intended to do.</strong></em> Let's support each other. Let's take the good with the bad, the joy and the grief, the ugly and the beautiful. That's what life is about... </span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #0b5394;">Doing Life Together...</span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #0b5394;"><em>'When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.'</em></span> <span style="color: #0b5394;"> <span style="font-size: x-small;">Henri Nouwen - Grief and Grace by Amanda Axelby</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-size: x-small;">(*) The Shaming of the Strong - Sarah Williams</span>Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-68014572304733643712013-10-24T19:47:00.000+08:002013-10-24T20:01:22.852+08:00Day 24 - Artwork<div align="center">
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<em><span style="color: #073763;"><strong>Everyday</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">I miss you</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">I think about you</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">I remember the day you were born.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">I recall the uncertain days leading up to your birth</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">and the painful days afterwards.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">I look at the tiny clothes you wore</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">spread out next to my bed.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">I look at the photo I keep on the fridge</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">of you in my arms.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">I write about our journey together on my blog.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">I talk about you regularly. </span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">I feel lost without you here with me, it is unnatural.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">I do the things that need to be done</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">even though my heart is hurting.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">For 11 weeks and 2 days</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #bf9000;">I've missed you</span></em></div>
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<span style="color: #073763;"><em><strong>Everyday</strong></em></span></div>
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<em><span style="color: #073763;"><em><span style="color: #073763;"><strong>I wrote 'Everyday' on Charlotte's due date.</strong></span></em></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #073763;"><strong>My writing is my artwork, my way of creatively expressing my grief.</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><strong><span style="color: #073763;">My brother drew this picture of a 'Charlotte' rose for the front cover of </span></strong></em></div>
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<em><strong><span style="color: #073763;">Charlotte's memorial booklet.</span></strong></em></div>
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Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-60295060893332771852013-10-23T21:14:00.000+08:002013-10-23T21:28:09.573+08:00Day 23 - Jewellery<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
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We arrived at the church early, I felt hurried and tense, it was the day of my baby's funeral. We waited quietly in a side room as people arrived. The funeral director gently averted my attention to the little white casket waiting in the corner of the room. It was time to say goodbye... </div>
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As we were holding her, we fastened a tiny chain with a broken pendant around her neck. On it, we had engraved the word 'Mummy'. I wear the other half. </div>
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It is a physical reminder of a love lost, of a heart broken and of a piece of it that's missing...</div>
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<br />Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-58793259031316098402013-10-22T21:30:00.001+08:002013-10-22T21:43:59.314+08:00Day 22 - Words<div style="text-align: center;">
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">For you created my inmost </span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">being;</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;"><strong>you knit me together in my mother's womb.</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">I praise you because I am</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">fearfully and wonderfully </span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">made;</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">your works are wonderful,</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">I know that full well.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;"><strong>My frame was not hidden from</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;"><strong>you</strong></span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">when<strong> I was made</strong> in the</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">secret place.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">When I was woven together in</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">the depths of the</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">earth,</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;"><strong>your eyes saw my unformed</strong> </span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;"><strong>body.</strong></span></em></div>
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<strong><em><span style="color: #0b5394;"></span></em></strong> </div>
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><em><strong>All the days </strong></em><strong><em>ordained for me</em></strong></span></div>
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<strong><span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><em>were written in you book</em></span></strong></div>
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<strong><span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><em>before one of them came to</em></span></strong></div>
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<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><em><strong>be.</strong></em></span><br />
<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><em><strong></strong></em></span><br />
<span style="color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><em> <span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">~Psalm 139:13-16</span></em><span style="color: black; font-family: Times New Roman;"> ~</span></span></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">I love these words. </span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">God knew my babies. </span></em><br />
<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">He created them for His purpose.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #0b5394;">The number of their days were in His hands.</span></em></div>
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Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-59728941064858436042013-10-21T17:07:00.003+08:002013-10-21T17:09:21.816+08:00Day 21 - HonourIt is an honour to be a mother. A mother to children who live with me and a mother to children in heaven.<br />
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I have honoured the memory of my girls by making their story known @ 'We Dreamed of You'. Even though their lives were short, they were significant and impacting.<br />
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We also honour them by:<br />
Celebrating them, their anniversaries and birthdays.<br />
Participating in a 'Walk to Remember'.<br />
Delivering gift boxes to the hospital for families who have lost babies.<br />
Visiting their resting places.<br />
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Their siblings honour them when they publically correct me saying that I have 4 children instead of 6.<br />
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We honour them every time we speak their name - <br />
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<em><span style="color: #990000; font-size: large;">Charlotte Rose & Abigail Faith</span></em></div>
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we will forever honour the memory of you, simply because you are ours.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Charlotte's Memorial Day - April 2011</td></tr>
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Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-12235323830919747722013-10-20T23:06:00.003+08:002013-10-20T23:19:07.540+08:00Day 20 - Hope<br />
I hope that - <br />
Charlotte's life will continue to make an impact and a difference.<br />
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I hope that - <br />
I will be able to help and encourage others on their journey.<br />
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I hope that - <br />
resources, organisations and communities will continue to grow and flourish in order to help families who have suffered the loss of a baby/child.<br />
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<span style="color: #0b5394;"><em>"...but those who<span style="font-size: large;"> <strong>hope</strong></span> in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31</em></span></div>
Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-48668330549002701502013-10-20T14:18:00.000+08:002013-10-20T23:29:21.186+08:00Day 19 - Support<br />
It is difficult in the early days when grief is raw to connect with people. I felt like I was living in a bubble, disconnected with reality and suspended in time. Texts and comments on my blog became my lifeline to the outside world. It was good to know friends were there for me even though I couldn't make contact with them yet. <br />
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As I got stronger, I wanted talk to about my baby and my grief. My world was 'Charlotte' and she was all I wanted to think about. I deeply appreciated those who entered into my pain, as it wasn't the most comfortable place to be.<br />
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At times, I lamented over the silence which seemed to surround me. Grief can be a lonely place. Grief surrounding the loss of a baby particularly so.<br />
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My blog brought a lot of healing to me. It provided me with a way to put my deep pain into words. I needed to communicate, to tell my story, to make it known. People could read it if they wanted to, but simply knowing that someone was reading it was enough. I also desired to connect with others through my blog, who were walking a similar path to mine.<br />
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<span style="color: #351c75;"><em>"The best way to help people in grief, I have realised, is not to try to pull them out, not to try and make them better, but just climb down, take their hands, and sit with them awhile. Let them cry, and cry some more."<span style="font-size: x-small;"> Anna Hogbin from Grief and Grace - Amanda Axelby</span></em></span><br />
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<br />Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-4773658717284311662013-10-18T17:48:00.000+08:002013-10-18T17:58:03.817+08:00Day 18 - Release<br />
I don't feel any bitterness, anger, guilt... in regards to my babies lost.<br />
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I am deeply thankful for the path that we chose to walk after my 12 week scan...<br />
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We chose to let God be the 'giver and taker' of our baby's life. We committed the difficult days ahead to God and let Him make the decision as to how long our baby would live.<br />
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<em><span style="color: #351c75;">"All the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be." <span style="font-size: xx-small;">Psalm 139:16</span></span></em><br />
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God in His mercy gave Charlotte 28.5 weeks of life and He gave us the opportunity to meet her, hold her, love her and then... <span style="color: #351c75;"><em>release</em></span> her into His everlasting arms.<br />
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<strong><span style="color: #351c75;">'HE'</span> </strong>released me.<br />
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Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-30794007232833476202013-10-17T19:42:00.002+08:002013-10-17T20:14:27.126+08:00Day 17 - Time<em><span style="color: #b45f06;">"Many grieving parents speak of a wish for time to stand still, a desire to be suspended in time, because the pain of moving from here is too hard." Amanda Axelby</span></em><br />
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The rhythmic hands of time, tick... tick... tick...<br />
Relentlessly marching forward...<br />
Not stopping, pausing or slowing for a moment<br />
...it leaves me behind in my pain.<br />
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Caught in a vacuum of grief,<br />
I can not keep up time's frantic pace, nor do I want to.<br />
My heart belongs in April 2010,<br />
It is there that I'm with her.<br />
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But time succeeds in tearing me away,<br />
Removing me from the moment.<br />
It takes me a million moments away...<br />
From where I want to be.<br />
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I've been taken three and a half years away -<br />
From that moment in time.<br />
Has 'time' helped to heal all wounds -<br />
Like the saying goes..? <br />
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Despite the measure of time against me<br />
It can not change the simple fact -<br />
That she was <span style="color: #e06666;"><em>my baby, my child, my family<span style="color: black;">.</span></em></span><br />
Wounds, now scars remain as evidence of her existence.<br />
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Time can not take away the impact that she had,<br />
Or the reality that she was here.<br />
Our fourth born child, a part of us,<br />
Now alive where 'time' does not even matter.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A moment in time - the time of Charlotte's birth</td></tr>
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<br />Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-60195388460819279932013-10-16T22:41:00.003+08:002013-10-16T22:41:47.438+08:00Day 16 - Seasons<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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My favourite season is Autumn...</div>
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The cooler, shorter days; trees awash with colour - purples, deeps reds, browns; wind, falling leaves, clouds, changes in the weather, blankets out of storage, jumpers.</div>
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April marks the turning point...</div>
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The heat dies off and the sun leaves at a respectable hour. I love these changes.</div>
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A beautiful time of year to remember my sweet baby's birth - April 14</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">L O V E</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">'There is a time for everything, and a season for everything under heaven.' Ecc 3:1</span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sunset at Mullaloo Beach, Perth - April 14, 2013<br />
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Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-41096171142123909042013-10-16T20:50:00.000+08:002013-10-16T22:00:21.616+08:00Day 15 - Day of Remembrance<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong>15. Wave Of Light:</strong> Today is October 15th Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. Light a candle at 7pm to help create a continuous wave of light around the world for 24 hours. Photograph your light! Please remember to share your location for this day as well. Wishing you all a ton of love for this sacred day of remembrance. </span><span style="font-size: x-small;">Carly Marie @ Capture Your Grief</span></div>
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<span style="color: #e06666;">Remembering</span> my baby girls today & always...</div>
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<span style="color: #e06666;">Charlotte Rose </span>- April 14 2010</div>
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<span style="color: #e06666;">Abigail</span> - January 25 2011</div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">"May the Lord keep watch between you and me when we are away from each other." - Genesis 31:49</span></div>
Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-7850297539463563162013-10-14T20:41:00.000+08:002013-10-14T20:42:28.704+08:00Day 15 - International Babyloss Remembrance Day<a href="http://carlymarieprojectheal.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/Oct15th1.jpg"><img alt="Oct15th1" class="alignleft size-large wp-image-2433" height="590" src="http://carlymarieprojectheal.com/wp-content/plugins/image-shadow/cache/362008b7b6b4456f5d7dd5d7ec7cc77e.jpg" width="726" /></a>Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4142375492375758771.post-7412359179322723162013-10-14T11:11:00.001+08:002013-10-14T11:27:52.314+08:00Day 14 - Family<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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What our family <em>looks</em> like... </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ethan, Leah (holding Charlotte's heart), Caleb (holding Abigail's heart), Mikayla <br />
Mum & Dad in the reflection ;)</td></tr>
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What our family <em>really</em> looks like...</div>
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Dad---Mum</div>
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Mikayla (2003)---Ethan (2005)---Caleb (2008)---Charlotte (2010)---Abigail (2011)---Leah (2012)</div>
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Forever a part of us...</div>
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"Can a mother forget the baby...the child she has borne?<span style="font-size: xx-small;"> (Isaiah 49:15)</span></div>
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"Sometimes when one person is missing, the whole world seems depopulated." <span style="font-size: xx-small;">Alphonse DeLamartine</span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A white heart for miscarriage<br />
A pink heart for stillbirth</td></tr>
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<br />Juliannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14980323210191745687noreply@blogger.com0